The bed would not ever be made. Ever. The wisdom of leaving the bed permanently unmade would be the manifest and uncontested.

If a man thought his girlfriend's shoes were silly, he'd say, "Your shoes are silly." Not, "Those look great! You can wear them with that sundress!"

Every man would still have the same haircut he had in third grade.

All diamond mines would shut down, and the African civil wars they've spawned would sputter to a peaceful conclusion. Why? Because instead of spending two months' salary on a piece of ice, we'd spend it on the down payment for a modest beach house. We'd present the deed to you on one knee.

No one would ever power walk again.

Decisions would become final. For example, bathrooms would not get painted weird colors, then get repainted two days later.

Meg Ryan would be unemployed. Oprah Winfrey would return to sporadic acting jobs. Celine Dion would be arrested for crimes against humanity.

Lacy bath towels would disappear from the earth, as would love seats (a little couch?). Homes wouldn't be nicer, but their furnishings would make sense.

National household savings would increase by 34 percent. The national household rate of doggy style would go up approximately 21 percent. The national household rate of kids cracking their heads would rise 18 percent.

Sadly, a certain number of men would die every year after their toenails grew so long they curled back on themselves and pierced vital organs.

All male friendships would eventually collapse because no one would force us to apologize to each other.

Relationships would progress as such: Meet a girl, have sex five minutes later, date for several years (while seeing other people), move in together when kicked out by landlords, date some more, consider engagement and family life sometime around age 84.

The human race would last maybe two more generations (and that's being generous).

Thanks to Glamour magazine, September 2004.

that was cute

So true... sadly. *Toenails crush lungs*

This does not apply to gay men!

i liked that ..and it was all true..lol..

that was so true

dat was soo true!

That sounds true to me.