Although currently my husband is able to accomodate as much as I wish, that wasn't always the case in my single days. I realized that the one person that I truly cared about was just using me when he was lonely, although as much as I tried to see it as 'friends with benefits', emotionally it wasn't something that i was ready for, with him. The feelings for him were still too strong. But at the time, I wanted to be with him at any given moment, not just sexually, but also to spend time with him, so i let myself believe that eventually he would fall back in love with me if i kept up the friends with benefits for him, well, it didn't happen, I felt terrible and had alot of resentment towards him. Although I believed at the time he was just playing games, looking back now, he warned me several times not to see more into what we were doing than it really was. However, considering that he knew how I felt towards him, because he didn't take the initiative to leave me alone and not pull the heart strings each time to get me there, i was used.
But now, I can thank him for helping me grow up and stop settling for mere convenience or loneliness, I am happily married and enjoy every moment that i can with my husband.