I don't know if this is the case with you and your husband, but many women have the habit of wanting to drone on and on, whining but not wishing to work towards a solution. Men often tend to learn to filter this out. This leads to a break down in communication.

Bringing up ancient history and recording things to use against them in the future isn't really constructive either. If you have a problem with your SO figure out what some acceptable solutions to the problem would be before you open a discussion about it, then work towards the solution or a compromise once you do.