Hey bad puter, would have quoted you but it was long so I am just adding this...I guess there was no closure on the ex, being he was anebreated most of your time together..you may never know...sometimes the co-dependency is all about living with the drunkeness and not knowing the difference because the sobriety of the said individual may be something you would rather not encounter in this life, sound strange? well let me just say I can relate..

If your bounty with apples of gold have now surfaced with the new man, then just take one day at a time, newness wears off after a year..so the true colors are revealed, if he is still even keyed and stable, he may very well be a keeper..just be sure to weigh in the balance..< no kidding on this...the more positive in what you need, dont waver..never settle for less than what you really want..because this is your life and wow its ever so short here on earth...

Good luck
Sherri